What are communication gaps costing you, by Nancy Fox

If I asked my clients and colleagues to rate their communication abilities, most would rate themselves pretty high. I don't know too many people who tell me that they are poor communicators. Most people tell me alot about OTHER people who are poor communicators. I find this very interesting.

Even though communication is a big part of my professional work, a recent experience compelled me to write about this because it is so easy to slip in one's communication. And boy can that cost you.

A short time ago, I engaged a vendor to be part of my team. We summarized our conversation, our agreement, and how to proceed. We had a timetable for next steps and when different tasks were to be complete.

Being a conscientious communicator (read: worry-wart), I checked in two days before the due date, and one day before the due date. Response emails were sparse. Alarm bells were starting to go off in my head. On the due date, I reached out and asked what was happening. The service provider promised to have the task complete by day's end. The day's end came and went. I was pretty upset, to say the least. But I was also very perplexed.

The next day I learned that the vendor was not going to be able to work with me on the project. Another previous assignment had expanded for this person and it wasn't going to be possible to work together after all.

What was most distressing about this situation was not just that I wasn't going to be able to work with this talented person as planned but that I was in the dark about what was happening for almost a week. Had I known there was a potential problem brewing, I could have addressed it 3 or 4 days sooner.

When we finally discussed the situation, this vendor had heard my communication about my plan for our work together differently than I had said it would be. Fortunately I had an email message clearly spelling out the the plan, but nevertheless this person hadn't HEARD it.

What was the impact of this Communication Gap? On me, I lost several days in a very time-sensitive situation and possibly some business. For the vendor? Possibly some future business, but not because I don't think this person is talented and has great expertise. If someone doesn't communicate and doesn't see how important that is, how can I feel confident and secure in working with that person?

In a second example, a colleague was complaining because a client was threatening not to pay his bill. He had sent his client a bill for 6 months worth of service. As you can imagine, after 6 months, it was a pretty hefty bill. The client went ballistic and was threatening not to pay. I asked my colleague if he had communicated the hours to his client as they had been accruing. I could tell by his blank stare that this monster-bill had come after months of a communication gap. My colleague didn't even call his client to let him know the bill was coming. No wonder the client was upset. Had the client been apprised of the hours and the fees that were building he could have been prepared or worked out an arrangement with my colleague. But my colleague is clueless that he wasn't communicating.

So I ask you: What is a failure in communication costing you?

Whether it's your client, your staff, your vendor, your children, or even the significant others in your life, a failure to communicate is very costly.

Paul Newman's prison warden made the line "What we have here is a failure to communicate," immortal in the classic film, Cool Hand Luke. Luke, played by Paul Newman, wasn't getting the message about how to survive no matter how many times he had been told. Just because we repeat ourselves doesn't mean the message is getting in there.

There are only two important keys for you to be a successful communicator. All the other stuff is fluff.

1. Putting your message across in such a way that the listener completely and clearly understands your communication.

2. You must be able to actively listen to get ALL of the communication and to make sure you understand the communication from the perspective of the deliverer.

So what about listening?

Here's a huge area of difficulty for people.

We are so inundated with communication tools - phone, Blackberry/iphones, ipads, email, Tweets, FB, Im's, text messages. How can we possibly be present enough to listen actively to people who are sitting right across from us?

Just as Rafa Nadal improved his serve by practice, practice, practice, so we must PRACTICE listening - I mean really listening. And then we need to check in with people to see if we've heard everything completely and accurately.

The objective of listening is hearing - really hearing what someone is saying, all of what they are saying, and from their perspective, not yours.

Take me up on doing this 2-part exercise at least once this week and see what results:

Have a careful communication with a client or colleague this week. After you have delivered your message, ask your listener exactly what they heard. When then tell you, note whether they got all of it and if they got the context of what you were saying. Was anything missing or misunderstood?

Part 2: Have a conversation with someone this week where you really listen. Then repeat back all of what you heard. Did you get it all? Did you get the context correctly? Ask your deliverer if it's complete and accurate. Did you get it fully?

The cost of communication failures rarely shows up as a line item on your expense sheet, but make no mistake about it, what you don't say correctly and what you don't hear accurately is sapping your bottom line.

To your prosperity, fulfillment, and success,
The Business Fox

Nancy Fox is President of The Business Fox, specializing in coaching and advising entrepreneurs and professionals in attracting ideal high paying clients. She has worked with hundreds of high-level people in building thriving client relationships and playing their top game in business.
Visit her on the web at http://www.thebusinessfox.com/  or write to her at nancy@thebusinessfox.com.

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